Posted by: suek2001 | January 24, 2017

Days of Future Passed……

I have no problem with getting older…although I curse my body for feeling every ache and pain longer than it used to….and my eyes are a bit more crinkly than I think they should be….

Still, with age comes understanding…and also leaving things behind…..

I am writing this on the eve of what would have been my Grandmother’s 104th birthday…..and I just posted pics of her on Facebook..and all those memories should come flooding back…and some do…but most of the time I spent with her was a blur….

I spend the first twenty four years of my life with my Grandmother in it…..and now 21 years later, all I have are photographs…..

Every summer from 1980-1989, I went to see her..and my Aunt Betsy…we did road trips through the American West…and the Canadian Rockies. I have memories of raft trips…and picnics next to mountains…and walking through old western towns to see the history of all the rough riders and indians….I have those memories….all wrapped up in a narrative from photographs and vague retelling of road stories to others over the years…

It frustrates me on some level. I know others who have worse memories than mine but with a small family such as ours, every memory is precious..With both Betsy and Grandma gone now…our road trips are now locked in a time warp of photographs….

I miss my Grandmother…there was a lot of love there..conditional as it was..I still recall some moments….like sitting on her sun-porch watching the moon come up….or the way she shouted out Betsy’s name whenever she needed help…..or when she told me that she wished I had gone to a “real college to get a real job”…as writing was nice but no career..and Bible College wasn’t going to teach me anything…

I think of her now…and how proud she would be of my life….I have a job…with benefits…pays decent…and I get to help people..She may have viewed it as grunt, service work but if she knew about my savings, she would think I had arrived…status was a big thing for her….maybe it was wrapped up in a hope for security for her family’s future…. for the future, I really hope to hang on to some of these memories but I am not sure I will…with each year that passes, the time I had with her becomes merely another chapter in my life…

At least, she left with musical memories….she loved musicals..some big band..and the Moody Blues of all things….So, whenever I hear those types of songs, I think of her…..

For now, all I have is photographs…so I shall close with one from my personal collection…and thankfully one of the few I can recall…even if I wasn’t there the day it was taken…

My Mom and I visited my Aunt for Christmas of 1983..Grandma had purchased a bright red scarf to brighten up her winter days…(the older I get, the colder the weather gets, I see her wisdom in this choice)…We teased her endlessly as she wore that sucker everywhere…but you know what? She was sure easy to spot in a crowd…..

About a month after we left Minnesota, Betsy decided to send some winter photos..She loved to do that to torture Mom and I with cold-looking photos while we suffered through a beautiful FLA winter…So, on a rather warm day after a deep freeze, they did what so many Minnesotans do on the first nice sunny day in January…they went out and took pictures…

Here’s Grandma in her red scarf glory…seated on a wall near the frozen Minnehaha Falls, in South Minneapolis….I now have this red scarf…and I wear it every winter…Happy 104th birthday Grandma..I remembered!

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